I dislike very much when someone places theirself in someone elses business that has NOTHING to do with them making matters worse.

My heart weighs heavy on this lonely, cold eve.

I can barely breathe.

I do not know my surroundings. I do not know myself.

I want to break down and cry.

How hard I want to cry.

And to think my house will be filled with family tomorrow saddens me.

The fact that that saddens me, also saddens me.

Why did I let myself become this woman?

My heart weighs heave tonight, I do not want to breathe.

Ar’n’t I A Woman.

The Protest Psychosis: How Schizophrenia Became a Black Disease.

Collected Poems Of Langston Hughes.

The Handmaids Tale.

Drapetomania.

Dysaethesia Aethiopica.

Destitution.

Please… say it ain’t so.

I’m hoping, wishing, and praying Mother Nature sends me my package.

I never promised to always be there for you. Thats because I won’t.

Never said i’ll always be your friend, never said i’ll be there when you need me, never promised i’d ever make you happy, never really said anything I didn’t mean.

I can work four hours a night for four nights a week and get paid over $300 a night. And thats minimun. Like why the fuck not?

I’m selfish. I’ll never be there for you when you need me. I’ll always wonder where were you when I needed you. I’ll forget about our friendship quicker than it was formed and not allow you back into my life. I push people away for the simple fact that I just might feel like it, or because I feel i’m getting too close. Don’t cry in front of me because i’ll be in an awkward position, won’t know what to do so i’ll probably just stare past you while saying over in my head “I really wish this bitch would stop crying”. I’ll do all this with no regrets. So take my advice, do not befriend me. Save yourself.

juliusdurreaux:

I am Black American… two totally different things

 OMG I try to explain this all the time! People think i’m denying my African roots but i’m not African-American! Yes, I am black. Why am I considered African-America and Charlize Theron and Sasha Piertese are not? Because of their skin complexion.? Not fair to us, not fair to them, and not fair to other Africa born Americans.

(via ethereal-eyes)

I’ve realized that I get less attention because i’m such an introvert. I don’t voice my feelings. I just write about it. I don’t complain about not having enough, I don’t cry when things aren’t going my way, I take life struggles as they come and deal with them, I get over them. I didn’t do anything when my dad passed right in front of me, I didn’t make a scene after, I did what I thought I was suppose to do, what I was expected. I began cutting in the 7th grade, how didn’t anyone notice? Everytime I was sad they contributed it to my “nasty attitude” but no one realized I was hurting. No one even bothered to ask me if I was ok. I was just a kid in the family, the girl who was mean to her brother. My brother got help for his anxiety in ‘06 and they even tried to hospitilize him. He told me yesterday that it should have been me in the hospital instead of him. I totally agree. But he got attention because he was loud. So i’m projecting my voice. I’m going to be loud. I DESERVE to be happy. 9 years is entirely too long. I’m ready.